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The Museum Of Bad Art (MOBA) Newsletter, Issue #56
June 30, 1998


MOBA'S SATELLITE GALLERY

The exhibit "MOBA Classics - From Pablo to Pals" is currently open to the public at MOBA's Satellite Gallery at the Back Alley Theater in Cambridge MA.

Tuesday through Thursday 6:30-9pm
Saturday 4:30-6:30pm
The exhibition of some 20 MOBA masterpieces grace the walls of Improv Boston's performance space at The Back Alley Theater, 125 Cambridge Street, Inman Square, Cambridge MA. In addition to some of the most well known and beloved MOBA paintings, the exhibition also includes recent breathtaking new acquisitions including "Dog" from Copenhagen, "Joan Crawford" by Bowshie and "Burger at the Beach" by artist unknown, donated by Steve Gaddis.

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NEW ACQUISITIONS

The spring of '98 has been a particularly fertile season for new acquisitions.

Bottomless congratulations go to LJH of Cohasset MA who offered his entire body of work to MOBA. Never before has a single artist succeeded in having three works accepted into the MOBA permanent collection at one time. The successful works are comprised of "Kali At The Beach", a shimmering beachscape complete with a red bikini clad, 10 armed icon, "Ore", a depiction of a silver haired child steering a meteor through space, and "Pokra Con Carlos", illustrating the apparition of a giant hat between two friends in a desert.

LJH's workmate at Cohasset Cable Access was also successful in his submission of his acrylic on canvas work "Purple MontaMountainjesty", featuring a metallic-teal, taloned giant startling a tiny family, as he chokes on a gob stopper sized earth in his open mouth.

Grateful thanks and congratulations to Gayle and Bob from Florida. The selfless generosity of this couple is unbounded with the donation of their favorite bathroom piece, "Green Figure on Sharp Rock" a work of profound sadness showing a blue skinned nymphet, her bottom skinned by barnacles pondering her return to the depths of the murky ocean in the face of an unpleasant storm. Gayle packed the piece into their silver Airstream before their annual pilgrimage to the north and the couple hand delivered the enormous piece to the Director of Aesthetic Interpretation at the Permanent Gallery in Dedham. As we have no way of contacting the couple, we would be thrilled to hear from them by phone or email to verify the spelling of their names.

Robert Judd, antique restorer, donated six pieces which had been abandoned at his workshop some years ago. Congratulations to Mr. Judd on his impeccable eye for bad art. "Guarding The Rock", an inexplicable portrayal of a colony of seals several hundred vertical feet above a Mediterranean seascape has been accepted into the MOBA collection.

Artist Chris House of South Bound Brook New Jersey, also knows the joy of having a piece accepted. His wonderful work "Goddess Fries Fish" is as voluptuous as it is lacking in emotion on behalf of either the Goddess or the fish.

Finally the esteemed curator himself breathlessly presented his staff with a watercolor on foamcore entitled "Queen of the Chocolate Chip", a not too subtle portrait of a Tudor queen eating a chocolate chip cookie. Mr. Wilson picked the piece up at a Hyde Park MA auction. A second work in the same medium, entitled "The Jester", is stupefying in it's geometric simplicity. "The Jester" was acquired from a yard sale in the same vicinity as the auction.

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THE OTHER MOBAs

MOBA - "Men On Bowling Alleys" Celebrate Bad End to Season

After riding high for the entire season, "Men On Bowling Alleys", the official bowling team of the Museum Of Bad Art, pulled out all the stops to finish bottom of their league at Ron's Gourmet Bowling and Ice Cream. The team, which included Mr. Scott Wilson, MOBA's Esteemed Curator, took its licks and licked its wounds, finding solace in the fact that they had, however inadvertently, managed once again to ensure that the word "good" will never be associated with Museum Of Bad Art.

While scanning the World Wide Web, our Director of Electronic Communications was alarmed to find that other MOBAs existed in far flung corners of the globe. The Museum Of Bad Art would like to assure the Friends Of MOBA that the following MOBA's are not in any way associated with the Museum Of Bad Art.

MOBA - Secrecy

The Mauritius Offshore Business Activities Act 1992 requires that all information and documentation received be kept secret and confidential and imposes a penalty of a fine of up to 300,000 Rupees and imprisonment for a term not exceeding 8 years for failure to comply.

MOBA - The Egg Handling People

MOBA of Barneveld in the Netherlands is the largest manufacturer of egg grading and egg packing machines in the world. MOBA has a worldwide reputation for inventive solutions for making egg grading and packing ever faster and more efficient.

The Board of Directors of has instructed Mr. Reilly, MOBA's Executive Director, "to spare no effort in pursuing these gross violations Of MOBA's trademark". Mr. Reilly was instructed to "demand both a written apology and a boatload of money for use of the word MOBA in inappropriate circumstances".

They further instructed, "if necessary settle for the apology and a year's supply of eggs, and further request that all future stories about other MOBAs should include the following words. "This organization is in no way associated Museum Of Bad Art -- we wouldn't no a piece of bad art if it bit us in the ankle."

Mr. Reilly immediately left on his mission and will be out of the office for the coming three months.

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FUTURE EXHIBITION

Preparations are in the works for two traveling exhibitions Of MOBA paintings.

Eclipse Gallery, Arlington VA, USA

In September, the collection will travel via armored car to Arlington VA for a gala exhibition at the Ellipse Gallery in Arlington VA from Sept. 8-Oct. 18. The board of directors is particularly delighted about this landmark show being hosted just outside our nation's capital.

In coming months, the museum will undertake a concerted effort to lobby our nation's leaders to take time out from their busy schedules to attend this ground breaking exhibition and to widen their cultural horizons... so we urge all members of the general public to arrive early and beat the hungry hordes of senators, members of congress, aides, lobbyists and interns to the free wine and cheese.

ArtWeek at Calgary's Festival of Art & Architecture, Alberta, Canada

As part Of MOBA's ongoing global expansion initiative: MOBA at the Millennium A Museum For The Planet.

We are proud to announce MOBA's first international exhibition at ArtWeek in Calgary. For too long, this museum has been the grateful beneficiary of a selfless philanthropy on the part of our neighbors to the north. Over the years of this museum's existence we have received a constant stream of both Canadian visitors to our gallery in Dedham MA as well as a constant stream of donations of art from Canada's rich storehouse of bad art treasures. Not since perhaps World War II has any nation suffered such a systematic stripping of its vast cultural heritage.

In view of this rather embarrassing situation, the Museum Of Bad Art is thrilled to be able to give something back to Canada. We are delighted to be holding our first exhibition in Canada and we are certain it will lead to many years of ever more fruitful artistic and cultural plunder.

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NEW ACQUISITIONS

Every once in a while, the acquisitions department is redecorated by fallout from a pastel. Such was the case upon the arrival of "Self Portrait As A Bird", by Rebecca Harris. It was obvious from the stains on the hands and the huge smiles on the faces of the staff from the Esteemed Curator, Mr. Wilson Himself to the lowliest member of the janitorial staff, that this was a masterpiece which will be remembered by everyone who ever sees it. Our profound thanks to the artist for her generous donation to this proud institution.

Details of other works acquired over the sultry summer will be revealed in the next MOBA News.

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FROM THE MAILROOM

DEAR FRIENDS,

My girlfriend and I are arriving in Boston, by bus, Saturday, April 11, 1998. We are fully expecting to escape our corporate Quincy Market shopping spree to explore your exciting city.

I would love to dazzle my true love with my expert taste and inside information on Bad Art.

If you were in my shoes, what would you do?

Sincerely,
Paul Berry

p.s. she is beautiful

Dear Mr. Berry,

Marry her.

Sincerely
Parker McGurl
"Special" Assistant to the Executive Director

Dear Parker,

Thanks so much for your advice. I knew I could depend on MOBA. There is a very good chance I will follow up on all your suggestions.

Thanks again!
Paul Berry

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Dear Ms. Jackson,

I haven't heard in so long I'd almost forgotten. I hope that doesn't indicate bad news. Did my submission ("Stick-on Critique") get presented yet? What's the verdict? What did the Esteemed Curator think of it?

You may imagine that I am trembling in anticipation.

-- dr foo

Dear Doctor Foo,

It is with great sadness that I bring you the news. The piece you submitted -- a repro Matisse with airair freshener-- brought great joy and a chuckle to our Esteemed Curator, Mr. Wilson, who deemed it worthy of inclusion in the permanent collection. However, due to the roach egg situation, the piece was being stored in a garbage bag outside behind our offices, awaiting conservation treatment, when, due to El Niño, several creeping things amassed in the bag and began to egress, much to the dismay of your humble servant.

The work was then moved further from the building, although still within the grounds of the MOBA campus.

I must now admit that the subsequent events happened in a chain of thoughtlessness on my part. The black garbage bag was inadvertently placed by me for safekeeping in a Rubbermaid trash can, and was accidentally returned to the public refuse system, from which, we hope, it may someday emerge, bug free, at a time in the future.

Prostrate in humiliation and apoplectic in apology, I remain

Marie Jackson
Director of Aesthetic Interpretation

My Dear Ms. Jackson,

Wow! The first piece of "COMPLETELY Re-cycled" Bad Art -- pre-critiqued and then pre-returned to the refuse system before public display. Again, wow.

If you would consider including a brief memorial of the piece in any future publication, I would consider that justice had been done by such a bizarre work.

Thank you for your kind note. I will keep it with the sort of things it ought to be kept with.

Your even-humbler-than-before,

-- dr foo

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HELP WANTED

Friend Of MOBA Nancy Eaton is having trouble finding any information on two artists who are outside of the purview of the MOBA Permanent Collection. Nevertheless, it is possible that some other friends my be able to help her.

From: Nancy Eaton

Looking for biographical information on two artists who painted animals: Cassius Marcellus Coolidge, the man who painted dogs playing poker. All I was able to find out was birth/death dates (1847 - 1937), images and names of several of his paintings and that one of his works sold at auction in 1991 for $4638. I contacted the publisher today of the prints that I have, which I found in a great aunt's attic (roach droppings and all). They were going to look, too, but so far, nothing. Also looking for information on Alfred Mainzer, who painted mostly cats but also dogs dressed up and doing everyday things, usually being disrupted by children-kittens making nasty mischief. I have called the Alfred Mainzer foundation in NY but, oddly, they refuse to give out any biographical information on the artist (who is now deceased). I appreciate any help you can give.

MOBA's Director of Electronic Communications suggests that replies should be sent directly to Nancy and copied to MOBA so that we can keep all valuable information buried deep within our electronic archives.

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BAD ART FORUM

Bob Stewart, our longtime supporter and host Of MOBA's World Wide Website has recently added a "Forum" feature to encourage visitors to MOBA's website to exchange their thoughts, musings, opinions, and dirty laundry about bad art.

To use the Forum feature, click on the "Forum" icon at the bottom Of MOBA's web page -- you will be instantly transported via a blinding blur of HTML, CGI, TCP/IP and other technologies so advanced that they don't yet have acronyms -- to the Glyphs Forum. Note that you will be sharing the forum with lovers of both fine art, bad art and everything in between so we urge you to start the subject line of all MOBA inspired postings with "MOBA".

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NOW YOU CAN SLEEP WITH GEORGE

The MOBA staff is so excited it can hardly keep it's clothes on. Just as we were about to go to press, a shipment of new, fabulous and better than ever imagined MOBA T shirts arrived at the loading dock. The three designs include, "Sunday On The Pot With George", "Pablo Presley" and "Pals". If it's not quite T shirt weather yet, feel free to cozy up in bed with your favorite MOBA painting.

We are in the process of updating our website, so with luck, you can view this new line Of MOBA fine fashion apparel in the Gift Shop at MOBA's online store at www.massbaytrading.com/moba. We urge you to throw out your entire wardrobe and fill your closets with a complete collection Of MOBA T shirts by contacting Backyard Computing and ask for a catalog today.

*** VISA and Mastercard greedily accepted ***

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SUBSCRIBE TO THE MOBA NEWS

If you have any friends, relatives, neighbors etc. who are suitable candidates to become Friends Of MOBA -- send us their email address and we will begin the arduous induction process immediately.

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MOBA's Permanent Gallery

MOBA's Permanent Gallery is conveniently located 8 miles south of downtown Boston in the basement of the Dedham Community Theater, 580 High St, Dedham MA. The current exhibition "More Bad Art" features thirty recent acquisitions spanning the full range of the MOBA Permanent Collection.

Gallery opening hours are 6:30-10pm during the week and 1:30-10pm on weekends and holidays.

Admission to MOBA is always free, with steep discounts for children, senior citizens, local residents.





 

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